For the last 2+ years, kids have been dealing with everything we adults have and some things we haven’t. There’s been the pandemic, then distance learning and isolation, the economic instability, fear, and increased deaths. These have led to unprecedented levels of depression, anxiety, and trauma among all of us, including children, teens, and young adults.
– U.S. Surgeon General Advisory on protecting youth mental health.
Things are probably a bit different around the house or classroom with our teens given that they are likely to be experiencing any number of negative or anxious emotions. Problem is, many adolescents don’t easily share their feelings.
Show me a parent who’s not used to hearing “FINE” when you ask, “How’s it going?” But these days, with suicide on the rise, it’s important that we parents are paying attention to the clues that our teens are giving us.
RED FLAGS TO WATCH FOR
Disconnected Free Time. None of us expect our teens to spend every waking moment engaged in the home but watch for changes in typical behaviors. If your teen used to engage with the family and spend a good bit of time out in the rest of the house or yard, but now seems to be in their room an inordinate amount of time, coming out for bathroom and food only… that should raise a red flag.
Loss of interest. Before COVID, our kid’s schedules were often packed full of things they loved to do. Granted that many of the activities may not be available to them as practices and events get cancelled, but if your teen’s interest in sports, music, or activities just isn’t there anymore; or perhaps your teen has let some friends drop off… this should be a concern.
Self-Care. Pay attention to your teen’s sleep or eating patterns. Loss of healthy appetite or sleep are sure signs that something isn’t right. Have you noticed any “nervous energy”? Maybe they tap their foot constantly. Perhaps there is a noticeable decrease in energy. This should be a red flag as well. There is a delay in their responding to questions or they seem lethargic in moving around the house. Pay attention because in addition to depression and anxiety, recreational drug use is on the rise in many communities.
WHAT CAN PARENTS DO?
Listen. Pay attention. Ask good questions. Take the time to observe and communicate with your teen.
You may need to take care of yourself first. Often times we are so stressed adn run down, that we don’t have the emotional energy required to care for others. Make sure you are doing what you need to do so you can care for those around you.
- Eat well
- Get plenty of sleep
- Take care of your soul
- Exercise
Taking care of yourself will model for your teen how they can be making healthier choices and give you avenues of conversation with them in this difficult season.
Finally, remember that asking for help is always the right thing when you or your teen get in a place where you don’t know what to do next.
